Call 9-1-1 for NeutrOlene. Hondo, Texas, officials are scrambling to find new sewage pumps to serve the Ruben Torres Unit, where state inmates are blamed for destroying the old ones by flushing debris down prison toilets. The damage at the prison, just west of San Antonio, prompted authorities to ration sewer services on a rotating basis among the 1,300 inmates and employees.

The situation was brought to light by a prison visitor whose incarcerated relative reported Saturday that feces was piling up in unflushed toilets. Ugh! Smells like a job for NeutrOlene!

Getting a whiff of history. Our most meaningful memories usually have a small attached...your grandmother's perfume, cookies in mom's kitchen, suntan at the beach. Without a doubt, our sense of smell is often overlooked when we record our history. Instead, we connect with the past through objects displayed in a museum, photographs in a documentary, the writing in a manuscript.

It seems far-fetched that we could somehow preserve a whiff of our daily lives. But increasingly, technology is making it possible, and historians, scientists, and perfumers are now taking the idea of smells as historical artifacts more seriously.

Roman Kaiser, a Swiss fragrance chemist, developed a technology called “headspace” in the 1970s that made it possible to capture and analyze the scent given off by flowers and other objects. In 1995, Kaiser read a book called “Vanishing Flora,” He then convinced his employer, Givaudan, the world’s largest flavor and fragrance company, to let him embark on an olfactory version of the project.

Over the past 10 years, Kaiser has traveled the globe to capture the scents of hundreds of rare and endangered plants.

Mark Smith of the University of South Carolina believes studying smell and other senses is important, but they must be put into context. There are countless examples of how circumstance influences the way we perceive smells. For instance, wintergreen became popular in chewing gum and toothpaste in the United States after World War II, but to the British, the smell would have evoked sickness, since it was used in ointments to treat the wounds of soldiers. If we don’t understand these meanings, we’re just smelling the past as we would now - not as people did at the time.

That Darned Cat! I'll admit it. I'm a cat lover except when he claws the wool area rug in the family room. That's when I lose patience...finding hundreds of puff balls lying on the carpet as well as my hardwood floor.

NeutrOlene, as you know, is environmentally safe -- for human uses as well as for pets -- so I sprayed the area rug liberally, allowed it to dry and began monitoring my feline divas. Sure enough, they walked up to the rug, took a few sniffs, turned up their little pink noses and went on their way. Later that day, this was repeated. Twenty-four hours later, not one little ball of fluff from the carpet had been scratched up.

Thanks to NeutrOlene, my beloved ombre area rug may survive after all. Now, I'm going to spray the love seat so our dog will be discouraged from using it as his personal lounge.

Spray away your ship-out worries. About three decades ago, an airliner transporting a body from Canada to be repatriated in Europe made an unscheduled stop at New York's LaGuardia Airport. The reason? The body was not adequately embalmed and the odor of its decomposition had permeated the aircraft's passenger cabin. After the body was off-loaded and arrangements were made to correct the issue, the plane was fumigated but vestiges of that unforgettable odor remained.

To guard against similar issues, simply spray the ship-out box and its contents liberally with NeutrOlene and proceed normally. By partnering quality embalming with NeutrOlene, human remains can be shipped to Mars or neighboring planets with no chance of decomposition odors.

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